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Todd White Says God’s in Bed with you Watching Porn, Wants to be your ‘Climax’

News Division

In a clip that’s certainly worth a ‘viewer discretion is advised,’ Todd White made some startling claims about God’s intention towards humanity, saying that the infinitely holy and perfect God, the Lord of Lords, desires to be the equivalent of his creation’s sexual climax.

For a brief time, many had thought the notorious heretic had repudiated his false beliefs after delivering an emotional sermon where he admitted he was not preaching the full gospel– leaving people to wonder if he’d been saved. We put on our discernment caps and explained this is how we would know he was repentant . Sadly, the next week he demonstrated that he was not.

Steven Kozar of the Messed up Church continues to do the yeoman’s work by posting this video of Todd White making the comments during his August 31 service. First the salient clips, which are edited, and then the longer context uncut afterward.

God’s in you watching pornography….But they’re stepping into these areas because they don’t have intimacy with God…..He sees it, he’s right there in bed with you. He’s right there in bed with you and he’s seeing it all and he’s watching you…..He waits until you reach climax, God (says) ‘if he only knew me…if he only knew me. If he only desired to know me, I would be his climax.

By the way Todd makes it sound, God’s snuggled up in bed while dirty deeds are being done, reclining on the pillow while you pull up a “best of” list from pornhub. After that nasty business is finished, God is grieving afterward, a helpless, whiny, deity. He’s like the nerdy kid with a crush watching the most popular girl in school hanging out by her locker with her boyfriend, while he pines away in existential teenage angst.

“if only she knew me…what a guy I was…all my qualities….I would make her so happy…happier than that dumb jock could. If only she knew me… I would treat her right… I would be her cli-“

ANYWAY. If Todd White never uses that analogy again, it’ll be too soon.