Barbie Maker Produces “Gender-Fluid” Dolls

Mattel, the owner of Barbie, has released a new line of “gender fluid” dolls. The dolls are designed to decrease the gender stereotype of hyper-feminine, attractive females so that children cannot tell the gender of their doll. In other words, Mattel is trying to undo a gender stereotype that it’s spent 60 years making.

Barbie, who was “born” 60 years ago today, is known for her giraffe-long neck, bleach-blonde hair, and skinny legs up to her triangular-shaped bosoms that, if any sharper, could put out a kid’s eye.

As the hysterical, shrieking feminists at HuffPo pointed out a few years ago, if Barbie were an actual women, she would be 5’9” tall, have a 39” bust, an 18” waist, 33” hips and a size 3 shoe. Her weight would be at 110 pounds, 5’9″, and have a BMI of 16.24, which would qualify her for an anorexia diagnosis. Given that bodyweight, she would likely not menstruate (so I don’t see why the feminists are angry, honestly). And to top it all off, given her torso-to-limb proportions, Barbie would have to walk on all fours.

Sexy, right?

So in order to signal their virtue, Mattel is over-correcting the wheel and creating a doll more reminiscent of Saturday’s Night Live’s morphodite sketch comedy character, Pat.

They released in a statement, “Toys are a reflection of culture and as the world continues to celebrate the positive impact of inclusivity, we felt it was time to create a doll line free of labels. Through research, we heard that kids don’t want their toys dictated by gender norms. This line allows all kids to express themselves freely which is why it resonates so strongly with them. We’re hopeful Creatable World will encourage people to think more broadly about how all kids can benefit from doll play.”

Of course, this is largely untrue. Children do want toys dictated by gender norms.

My little girls (I have three) do not want gross, gender ill-defined, Bruce Jenner look-alike dolls (in fact, my oldest daughter wrote this critical piece on the Barbie story here). All of my daughters, as feminine as God made them, prefer anorexic, spider-legged, big-bust, eye-hazard Barbies to mutant-Barbies with a dress and a five o’clock shadow.

These dolls will sell like hotcakes…well…like hotcakes at an anorexia convention.

[Editor’s Note: Contributed by JD Hall]