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3k Nikes With ‘Holy Water’ Soles (to “Walk on Water”) Sell Out in Minutes

News Division

[This is not satire]. The soles of these Nike sneakers are filled with Holy Water blessed by a priest, so people can feel what it’s like to “walk on water.” They cost three-thousand dollars and sold out within minutes.

A company named MSCHF, based in Brooklyn, New York, took Nike tennis shoes, injected the Air Max 97s models with ‘blessed’ water from the Jordan River – where Jesus was baptized at Bethany, and put them up for sale.

The shoes are marketed as “Jesus shoes” and the Scripture reference, Matthew 14:25 is etched on the side.

And in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea…

The sea Jesus walked on was the Sea of Galilee and not the Jordan River. It’s also doubtful that Jesus needed special shoes to do so.

The holy water soles aren’t the only superstitious accouterments, however. The shoes also have frankincense-scented insoles, a crucifix threaded through the laces, and a red sole, which is usually worn only by Popes. The shoe box has a papal seal.

Two-dozen pairs of these shoes were made, and all were sold within minutes.

The designer told the press, “We were wondering, what would a collab with Jesus Christ look like?”

The answer would probably be, “a whiplash across the face” (John 2:15).