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Viral Tweet: “White People Love Dogs so Much Because Deep Down They Miss Owning Slaves”

French Bulldog

Why do white people love dogs?

Why does anyone love dogs? Maybe it’s because dogs are wonderful. Maybe it’s because a righteous man has regard for the life of his animal (Proverbs 12:10).

Or maybe it’s because white people are all racists. Every darn one of them. They all miss owning black people as slaves.

Unpopular opinion: white people love dogs so much because deep down they miss owning slaves. They love the owner and master dynamic, desperate for something to control.


Well, there it is. The dumbest thing you’ll see all day. Poe’s Law has struck again.

“Without a clear indicator of the author’s intent, it is impossible to create a parody of extreme views so obviously exaggerated that it cannot be mistaken by some readers for a sincere expression of the parodied views.”

Evidence suggests the viral tweet was sincere, if intentionally provocative.

With 8,000+ Twitter likes at publishing time, there seems to be an appetite for this kind of stupidity. Or at least for talking about it.

It is a fad today to test just how far the premises of Critical Race Theory can lead. State education tends to produce young men and women with only one skill: theorizing about the secret vices of others.

How should dog owners—white or otherwise—feel about all this? Michael Van Der Galien at PJ Media offers a positive spin:

“The more radical leftists repeat such silly accusations, the more voters are driven in the arms of Trump and other conservatives. So, who knows? Perhaps us dog owners should thank Danielle for her tweet.”

At press time, it was unclear if AOC and the gang of four had yet issued a demand for the immediate emancipation of dogs, followed by cash reparations and free college tuition.