Mote Slayer Meyer: Joyce Unknowingly Creates “Duh” Moment For Church

 

As reported in The Christian Post, pastrix and false teacher Joyce Meyer preached a sermon that the church is compromising with sin.  The Christian Post article was titled – (I’m not kidding, either)Joyce Meyer: Church Is Making Compromise With Sin.

It is not clear whether the congregation voiced audible confirmation of her words by collectively uttering, instead of “amens,” the obvious response of “DUH” the message ought surely have provoked.

(Knowing that you, dear reader, probably recognize the brazen hypocrisy of this story, I now conclude this article.  An appendix follows, if interested, and if laughter-infused shock and awe permit.  LOL.)

Contributed by Bud Ahlheim

 

(Appendix)
That female “pastor” and false teacher Joyce Meyer “PREACHED A SERMON” to her “church” that it is compromising with sin and did not, given the prime opportunity for it, point to herself as evidence of her own sermon’s truth would be laughable if this charlatan were not deceiving so many.

Apparently continuing in her satirical sermon series of “Look at yourselves and not at me,” Meyer is quoted saying, “There is a ton of compromise in the church today.”

(Umm, yeah.  This is the moment, instead of the “amens,” you should say “DUH.”)

The baritone-voiced false prophetess reminded the egregious sinners in her cult that God expects them to be holy and happy.  But, she warned, “We can catch unholiness by hanging out with the wrong people consistently,” emphasizing the heretofore unknown airborne characteristics of sin.  (Gee, Joyce, we always thought sin was “original,” not merely a viral condition one might contract by bad associations. If so, perhaps we should just quarantine you.)

The presumed antidote for this risk of airborne-contracted unholiness is to go to church, to her church, where, perhaps, holiness may infect you instead … from a woman preacher … preaching a false gospel … unrestrained by the commands of Scripture. (Yeah, sounds like something God would do … if God were Joyce Meyer.)

“Sometime,” she said, “you’re gonna need to get full enough of God, to get into a situation that’s difficult, and just be what you say you believe on Sunday morning.”

And by that comment, Meyer means … well … I’m not actually sure. It seems to be a mixture of word-faith-activate-Jesus-fill-yourself-up-with God in moments when unholiness might be transmitted.  She means moments like when “I hang out with the wrong people, and listen to dirty jokes, and I sit and partake in all the office gossip, and go to all kinds of raunchy movies, and I go to parties where there is drinking and all kinds of sexual stuff.”

(Umm, about those “bad associations?”  Sounds like maybe the unrepentant crowd over at Meyer’s “church” ought to be included on the list of unholy places to avoid.  And it is.)

Doing those things, she said, and then going to church on Sunday is not pursuing holiness. Later, in a moment of conflicting theological confusion, she states, first, “We are made holy by the grace of God.” (Hmm, sounds right.) Then, “Believers are called to sanctify themselves.” (Aaaanndddd, NOoooo. I can’t do that, Joyce. You can’t do that, Joyce. You had it right and then you went right into your self-empowerment schtick.)

Well, Joyce might not qualify according to the 1 Timothy 2:12 rule, but she’s evidently proven herself worthy of those “eyes blinded” parts of Scripture. Slaying the motes of unholiness in the eyes of her “church,” Joyce blew right past the lumberjacking opportunity in her own life though.

We know one thing for certain, Joyce has caught something … and it was not transmitted by obedience to Scripture.  (Somebody please pass me the hand sanitizer …)

(Contributed, again, by Bud Ahlheim)


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