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Dobson Reports it was Charismaniac Prophetess Who Led Trump to Christ

News Division

Maybe Dobson’s source is somebody in the room of prosperity charismatics who laid hands on him and anointed him along with Robert Jeffress, Paula White, Mike Murdock or David Jeremiah.

That’s what I wrote in the piece outlining the soteriological Sinner’s Prayer-related problems behind Dobson’s declaration of Trumps baby-Christian status and recent conversion. And as Dave Hester would say when bidding on a storage locker full of junk, “Yuuuuuup!”
I also wrote…

Polemic coverage on this story is both welcome and necessary, but most discerning souls have chosen to provide vocal rejections to the absurdity of a supposed Trump conversion, which is altogether as likely as Paula White’s charismatic tongue speaking being much more than gobbledegook. Somewhere in a gated, upscale subdivision in Nashville, Russell Moore is having an aneurism from the mere insanity of a Trump conversion claim. And this would be one time Moore would be right. It is silly.

As Dobson spilled the beans on his conversion story source, Moore reportedly tweeted, “Paula White is a charlatan and recognized as a heretic by every orthodox Christian, of whatever tribe.” While Moore is wrong on everything from Jesus’ alleged illegal immigrant status, RSVP’ing gay wedding receptions to considering Roman Catholics Christians, he’s right on this. Paula White is a charlatan and recognized as one by pretty much every orthodox Christian in the world. Except Michael Brown, probably, who is somewhere wagging his finger in explanation that false prophecy doesn’t make one a false prophetess. But for the rest of us, White’s orthodox credentials are as existent as Joel Osteen’s expository notes.
White, if you recall, recently prophesied that Trump was “touched by God,” at which point I wondered if such were true, if God’s response would have been, “Gross.”
Dobson attempted to downplay his certification of Trump’s born-again status, with Charisma News reporting he claims he’s “not sure” Trump is born again. It is this same article that identifies Paul White as the evangelist. After all, Dobson says, only God can for sure know somebody’s heart. Astoundingly, Dobson thought it would bolster his claim that Paul White has led him to Christ.
At this point we have to wonder, what’s more Downgrade, that Dobson believes Donald Trump is saved or that Dobson believes Benny Hinn’s mistress, a prosperity preacher and false prophetess extraordinaire (Paula White is all three) is saved. For polemicists, our answer is resoundingly the latter. If White share the Gospel with The Donald, it might be the first time she’s ever shared the Gospel, which I suppose is like the elusive Bigfoot who can only be observed off camera.
Have no fear, though. Nobody who tells listeners to send in a $1,144 “Lazarus Seed” in exchange for a financially anointed prayer cloth could possibly be considered heretic, right. (Could it be we just learned the real secrets to Trumps financial success? Has he been sowing lots of Lazarus seeds?)
Pray for James Dobson. He doesn’t seem to understand what it means to be born again.
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