UPDATED: A 2k Bounty For Any Evidence Kyle J. Howard Was in a Gang
I’m getting really tired of this guy claiming he was in a gang. It’s widickiwis.
Kyle J. Howard is of mixed ethnicity, one of which is of the “oppressor class” and one is not. My math says that’s neutral.
He was born with incredible privilege, with the proverbial silver spoon placed there by two attorney-parents. He was raised in an affluent Atlanta suburb. His brother capitalized on his privilege and became an attorney like his parents before him. Howard has been a professional student most of his life and calls himself a “racial trauma counselor.”
However, Howard claims in his website bio that in High School he became “heavily immersed” in the Crips gang. Howard claims he carried a razor blade in his mouth, a .38 revolver on his hip and drugs in his pocket. Also according to Howard, he lived a double life, selling drugs at night but doing high school debate and keeping up his academics during the day. His parents apparently weren’t aware of his secret life as a Crips member because he would intellectually debate his parents over supper and then go smoke weed and live the thug life. Howard posts a photo of himself in a sideways ballcap as apparent evidence of his thuggishness.
Howard also claims he was a “battle rapper” in the “underground circuit” while excelling at his High School Latin class. There is no indication that Howard spent his summers hunting wolverines in Alaska with his uncle, but that’s a possibility.
Howard claims that upon meeting his future wife, he gradually walked away from all the gang activity (in the 11th grade – lol). Howard states that his then future wife was oblivious to his gang activity as well (this leaves a total of zero people who can substantiate Howard’s claims).
With someone as privileged (and white-privileged) as Kyle J. Howard, it’s critically important that he identify with the victim-class. To do so, he claims he was a secret gang member in highschool.
Pulpit & Pen will pay anyone 1k dollars for any evidence substantiating that Kyle J. Howard was in any kind of ‘gang‘ (in high school or college). Surely one of the 35 thousand active Crips gang members would remember Kyle J. Howard, the rich and affluent kid who joined their gang secretly, never told anybody about it at the time and then left without anyone caring.
If you have any evidence of testimony of Kyle J. Howard’s gang-life, email us at email@example.com.
In the meantime, we think Kyle J. Howard is evangelicalism’s Jussie Smollett (except Smollett was raised in an underprivileged home and his story was more believable).
UPDATE: KYLE J HOWARD RESPONDS
Right. He can’t tell us the name of his gang because of…dunno. But you know gangs, always known for their secret affiliations and stuff.
By the way, I mean it – and this is should be used in court if necessary – we’re 100% serious about giving a 2k bounty to anyone with definitive proof or credible personal testimony that Kyle J. Howard was in any way affiliated with a gang at any point in his life.
This is called “victimology.” No one put a “hit” on him. We’re asking anyone with testimony that this man, born with EXTREME white privilege and with thus far zero corroborating evidence, was in a gang to please submit the evidence for a nice little payday.
If Lil’ K-yle had street smarts, he might know that if you legitimately feel your life is in danger, don’t advertise to the world that you don’t have a firearm. Geez, man. Somebody look out for Malibu’s Most Wanted, here. He needs the help.
By the way, we’re not white supremacists. We believe in the total innate equality of all mankind, deny the biological or theological validity to the notion of “race” to begin with, and shun all forms of (real) racism. However, we are against race-baiting, Critical Race Theory, or making up a false life story to validate your status as a “racial trauma counselor.”